This past week I had coffee with the pastor of the church we're now attending. I talked for about an hour straight, telling my story. All the while he provided the appropriate empathetic statements as I talked. Then it was his turn. He and his wife had come off a very similar experience before coming to this church. There is another former pastor in the church who also had a similar experience. On Sunday, the three of us gathered together and joked about being the Fraternity of the Fired.
Sunday after church we attended the monthly "Pasta with the Pastor". It is an opportunity for people new to the church to meet the pastor and other church leaders. During this time they detail the ministries of the church, its philosophy and vision of ministry, their discipleship process, and other important details in the life of the church. There were approximately 15-20 other new people attending this event, but Tammy and I were the only ones saying "Amen!", "Awesome", "Great", or other exclamations of affirmation, probably because we were the only former pastoral family in attendance.
I must say, I was very excited about the possibilities of being involved in this church for a long time. They are doing everything I've ever had a vision for doing in a church. I don't say that to be critical of previous churches where I have served. That quite possibly is more a reflection on my ability to shape the vision of those churches. Whatever . . . that's not important anyway. The present and future are the point.
One of my strenghts (faults?) is that I make decisions quickly. Most of the time I am able to process all the data, possible scenarios, etc, and make good, wise decisions on the situation. I usually am able to recognize when I need to slow down and allow time to pass so that I can reflect more and get more input from others.
Yesterday was one of those times when I was ready to act. The church is getting to have a new members class and I mentioned attending that class to Tammy. She got bug-eyed and said, "It's too early to consider membership." I agree it's a fast turnaround. Part of my motivation is to learn even more about how the church operates. But I will admit that membership is something I'm willing to commit to. Unless there is some major theological conflict, why not go ahead and commit? We're mature Christians who have served in pastoral ministry and should understand these types of issues better than the average person who just happens to be looking for a church home. However, I will allow that the time factor should be cautiously exercised.
Most of the following questions are rhetorical. Now that I am on the second year of living faithfully, the question becomes "When?" If there is an peace and assurance from the Spirit about this church being a new place of ministry, why not now?
Monday, January 19, 2009
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Back Inside for a 2nd time
Today we returned to the church we visited on December 21. As I type this post, I'm not sure what to say about our experience. Having been a pastor, you always wonder how visitors view and experience what happens during the worship service. You hear things like, "I liked it." "It was nice." "I enjoyed your message." "We had a good time." None of those things really tell you anything. Therefore, I've had to stop myself from writing, "We had a good time and enjoyed ourselves. The message was very good."
When it comes to picking a new church home, there are lots of ways to make your final decision. Some people choose a church where they grew up. That becomes their church home by default. Others pick a church on the basis of the relationships they already have. Another important factor is the demographic of the church. Somewhere in this mix of data, people begin to weigh worship elements like the style and quality of the music and the pastor's message. I have served churches where new people liked everything about the music, the message, and the demographic. But after a few weeks, they left for another church. The deciding factor was the inability to connect with anybody at the church. They were not able to form new relationships with the people they hoped would become their new church family.
Well, so far after two visits at the church, we like the music and we like the sermon. We know a handful of people already. As we continue to try on this new church, the next step will entail getting our kids involved with aspects of the children's ministry there, as well as a small group for us parents. In a few weeks we will attend their monthly informational meeting for new folks called "Pasta with the Pastor". The week following that is fortuitiously the church's annual business meeting. This event is one of those that can't be dressed up in order to hide the warts. Here's where you'll get a good look at who the church really is.
A couple of factors in choosing a church have not been mentioned yet. What type of ministry opportunities are available, i.e. how can we serve using our gifts and talents? What type of outreach, locally and globally are being done? Is it clear that the Holy Spirit directs this church?
I'd like to wrap up by touching on that last one. I think it is clear that the Holy Spirit is present in the worship of this church. For the record, I think the Holy Spirit is present in the worship at ANY church, despite what some in the pews might say. We sometimes have a harder time as individuals detecting that because of our own issues. More importantly, I can sense that this church is a place where the Holy Spirit is directing us. He will lead and guide us as we integrate ourselves into the community life of this church. Partly due to my nature and past experiences, I found myself naturally wanting to get involved in as much of the church as possible. I even found myself subconsciously thinking that I needed to be at the church this Wednesday night to help take down Christmas decorations!
I hope to sit down with the pastor in the next 7 to 10 days to talk about the church. Unfortunately, I probably still have some baggage from last year that needs unpacking and I'm still looking at everything through the lenses of what I had hoped to be a home church model. This blog is about living faithfully. So for now, I'm being faithful to the Spirit's leading and going back inside is where he's taking me.
One final note. It's likely that this blog will not see as regular a schedule of updates as my other blog. That's partly due to the fact that this "year" is almost over. However, I will come back as often as necessary to post. On my other blog will be a link that will tell you when this site was last updated.
When it comes to picking a new church home, there are lots of ways to make your final decision. Some people choose a church where they grew up. That becomes their church home by default. Others pick a church on the basis of the relationships they already have. Another important factor is the demographic of the church. Somewhere in this mix of data, people begin to weigh worship elements like the style and quality of the music and the pastor's message. I have served churches where new people liked everything about the music, the message, and the demographic. But after a few weeks, they left for another church. The deciding factor was the inability to connect with anybody at the church. They were not able to form new relationships with the people they hoped would become their new church family.
Well, so far after two visits at the church, we like the music and we like the sermon. We know a handful of people already. As we continue to try on this new church, the next step will entail getting our kids involved with aspects of the children's ministry there, as well as a small group for us parents. In a few weeks we will attend their monthly informational meeting for new folks called "Pasta with the Pastor". The week following that is fortuitiously the church's annual business meeting. This event is one of those that can't be dressed up in order to hide the warts. Here's where you'll get a good look at who the church really is.
A couple of factors in choosing a church have not been mentioned yet. What type of ministry opportunities are available, i.e. how can we serve using our gifts and talents? What type of outreach, locally and globally are being done? Is it clear that the Holy Spirit directs this church?
I'd like to wrap up by touching on that last one. I think it is clear that the Holy Spirit is present in the worship of this church. For the record, I think the Holy Spirit is present in the worship at ANY church, despite what some in the pews might say. We sometimes have a harder time as individuals detecting that because of our own issues. More importantly, I can sense that this church is a place where the Holy Spirit is directing us. He will lead and guide us as we integrate ourselves into the community life of this church. Partly due to my nature and past experiences, I found myself naturally wanting to get involved in as much of the church as possible. I even found myself subconsciously thinking that I needed to be at the church this Wednesday night to help take down Christmas decorations!
I hope to sit down with the pastor in the next 7 to 10 days to talk about the church. Unfortunately, I probably still have some baggage from last year that needs unpacking and I'm still looking at everything through the lenses of what I had hoped to be a home church model. This blog is about living faithfully. So for now, I'm being faithful to the Spirit's leading and going back inside is where he's taking me.
One final note. It's likely that this blog will not see as regular a schedule of updates as my other blog. That's partly due to the fact that this "year" is almost over. However, I will come back as often as necessary to post. On my other blog will be a link that will tell you when this site was last updated.
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